Initiation:

Module Three

Integrating 

Now that you are on the other side of the initiation event, it is time to weave your learning into your life in practical ways. The process is similar to the preparation. You walked into the center of the spiral with an intention, to explore, experiment and express in order to dissolve and disrupt the foundation that was no longer serving your whole-self. Now you will unwind to re-enter the world in your new form.

To integrate from this next layer of the spiral, work the process backward. Experiment and express yourself with your new practices and experiences. This will guide your footing one step at a time as the new path unfolds and you choose your way. Explore the new foundation you are building. Find your new edges, take in the wider horizon, and re-center. Live intentionally from this new place. You may have new desires, longings, and callings that guide you.

Integration is where the real healing and work begins. Your particular integration plan will reflect your unique learnings and circumstances. We will work with you to design a plan that works best for your situation. Here are some basic parameters and suggestions for the integration process.

Journal

Write and reflect on your initiation experience. Write down everything you remember or that comes to mind, even if it is not in chronological order. Your experience was in liminal time and space, so linear timelines do not necessarily correspond or matter to the content and context of your experience. You may notice metaphors, messages, and patterns. Their meaning will not be one you can discern by any other means than what resonates with you. And their meaning may not unfold immediately. It is more likely that the meaning will happen over time as you integrate an expanded consciousness and it takes form and shape in the world.

Allow the meaning to arrive in a manifested state. The meaning IS NOT an exact explanation or justification. There may not be a logical reasoning we can discern between image/somatic experience and a particular life event or trauma. The meaning of why you saw this image or that one as it relates to a trauma may be less clear. It is not a bar graph but an impressionistic or surrealistic painting. What shows up in an image or experience in these deeply liminal experiences is more like poetry and less like math. There is not typically a direct correlation with a why question, and usually, we cannot find the answer in a book to determine a certain meaning. Your animal visitation may not mean what it says on a website through the Native American lens.

The symbols, animals, words and phrases, sounds or colors that show up in initiation events are reflections of your consciousness and the poetry of your soul. Only your soul knows how these images and symbols will inform and support you. Some images or experiences may have even been frightening, and they are messages that hold meaning in a manifested state.

In other words, meaning is what you see and how it feels to you. The meaning is how anyone of these symbols or moments show up and have changed you or your path. Meaning is the way these particular elements interface and show up in real life, sometimes in surprising and humorous ways.

The truest meaning is integration, sewing the new consciousness into our nature, becoming the next iteration of ourselves. When we do the difficult work of integration, we have an opportunity for important leadership. We can take the sacred symbols that live inside of us, as part of us, into the secular world. We can infuse everything in our world with Spirit if we choose to do so. Making notes about meaning may be a helpful way to witness your own transformation. Writing down the breadcrumbs (the symbols, images, messages, and visitors) that entered your circle during initiation will be your trail-markers, cairns, and clues that you are on track and supported in the work and service you are doing in the world.

The initiation experience is a resource. Consider your initiation experience as you might a dream. It is a hologram you entered that can be revisited any time in your imagination. You can move around in the images and enter through any point. You can reference this experience as a resource for practical purposes and see the world from a new perspective and vantage point. Journaling will help you identify patterns and messages so that you might recognize them more easily in daily life. Make notes about how new patterns are showing up, how you have surprised yourself with what you saw, felt, or did that was not part of your conditioning. What are you doing now with ease or resistance or in a new way? Where there is resistance (frustration, anger, confusion) there is work to be done. These are the other breadcrumbs you can follow to continue to shine the lantern into the shadows so that you might heal these precious parts of yourself that are asking to be tended.

notice, observe, allow, respond

It only takes one person to change a system. All of your relationships and systems of belonging will shift because you have transformed. Like the boundless mobile, you have transformed; therefore, all the systems you are part of are also changed. This ripple effect may bring delight or disturbance to the other members of your family, friends, or community. Everyone responds to change uniquely, and do not be surprised if your loved ones react with discomfort, anger, frustration, or confusion. They will have to integrate these changes into the relationship, too.

Grief and loss are part of growth and transformation. Some relationships will eventually deepen while others will fade or end. Your work in the world may change a little or a lot. There may be losses to grieve as you integrate your new consciousness. When these losses become apparent to you, observe, notice, and allow your emotions to find expression and support. This is part of growing and developing. When you became a teenager, you probably felt the pangs of loss for childhood every once in a while. You are still connected to Source. You are always connected. But, now you have stretched the umbilical cord another length toward your new edge as you become the leader our world needs. This can be painful and exhilarating.

Notice and observe with compassion and non-judgement. One way to help smooth out this process is to stay in a place of observation as much as possible. When you see ____ , how do you feel? Take your world in from this new perspective, and allow it it to penetrate and integrate through the images (internal or external) and your body. This is the same work that we did to prepare you for the experience.

Allow with deep presence and rootedness. From a place of compassion for self and others, allow others’ reactions and responses. Be a tree deeply rooted in the earth with wings that open to whatever needs to be expressed. Other’s emotions are not about you, and you can hold space for what may need to be expressed or experienced. This is your leadership, to allow others to be exactly where they are while holding true to who and where you are.

Even if you have explained the personal work and new discoveries to your loved ones, this may only offer them a cognitive understanding. True understanding comes through experience. So your friends, family, and co-workers may need some time to experience your new boundaries, behaviors, and beliefs. Respond from your center of knowing. Your gut knows. You are an intuitive powerful being.

Respond from your inner knowing and self-compassion. It will be tempting to slip back into your old conditioning, and you may. It is okay. Notice and observe with the same love and compassion you offer others. Allow yourself to explore and experiment without the expectation of perfection. Practice what you have only just learned. You are a newborn after all, so be gentle and kind and patient. Respond to yourself first, and then others. Work from the inside out. Take care of yourself before, during, and/or after difficult moments or circumstances. Love yourself always.

Practices

Choose a practice. It does not have to be the same and will likely need to change or shift with your new growth and development. Choose a practice that supports you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. At this juncture, your practices should hold you and bring comfort or insights. You have recently completed an ordeal, your own death and birth. Be gentle in your new skin. Take care of this precious part of you that was just born. You may want to go back through the modules to find the practice that feels best, or you may have another one you prefer. Yoga, breath work, eidetic imagery, meditations, music, time in nature sitting or walking, or being in or near water are all good places to start. The practices keep you in a place of participation and are ritual actions that invite in this new part of yourself. Your practice does not have to be grand or take up large portions of your day. It can be something you weave into your day for three minutes at a time. You may appreciate a morning and evening practice to begin and end the day. You will know what to do.

Write your personal mythology. Consider the shore you left to swim through the deep waters to discover your own gems. See where you stand now, the new ground. Revisit the key wisdom statements from your initiatory event, as well as the vivid images, symbols, and patterns. In contrast to the linear story you may have told about yourself in the past, create a mythology of who you are now. This story is whole with movement and fluidity, and paradox and resources. This tale tells the whole truth. It is a story that will carry you forward through images and knowing that live in your body.

seek support

You are not in this alone. You are interdependent and interconnected to All that Is, and you have support. You may require support in the form of therapy or counseling. Support may be a friend who can reflect or listen as you discern your next steps. It may also be yoga or other body-centric practices. We will discuss the options and resources that best fit your experience. We can help support you and connect you with resources in the community that will meet you specific needs.

New boundaries support your expanded consciousness. One of the most common areas where support is required is around new boundaries. You have expanded your consciousness. You are bigger and more aware with less in the shadows. This new knowledge requires new boundaries. What may have been okay before this initiation may not be okay now. You may now be in a position to now insist upon a healthy boundary around what has never been okay at home or the office. Working on setting clear boundaries with others will be challenging emotionally for everyone. However, clear boundaries are the best way to love self and others unconditionally.